Five nights or seven
Deciding where your children will live after a relationship breakdown is probably one of the hardest decisions a parent will make.
How many nights each fortnight will they spend with each parent, and what do those arrangements look like?
Fifteen to 20 years ago, arrangements would most likely have been children spending time with one parent each alternative weekend from Friday night to Sunday night, plus half school holidays, and then all other times with the other parent.
But in recent times, the “week about” arrangement has gained popularity, where children live with one parent for four to seven nights a fortnight, and then live with the other parent for the other nights in that fortnight.
The popularity and advent of week about arrangements has given rise to more disputes in the Family Court than ever before.
Typically when parents separate, the parent who has not been the primary carer during the relationship will often demand a week about arrangement, but is that really in the best interests of the children?
Some factors you should take into account when making this important decision include:
- Focus on what you think is best for your children and not on your own personal wants and needs.
- If there was an arrangement during the relationship where one party was the primary carer and the other was not, then be careful about thinking that an immediate step into a week about arrangement is best for your children – they are not used to such an arrangement and would obviously have a greater attachment to the parent who has spent more time at home with them, especially if they are younger.
- Consider what you think will work best for the children – if you work long and/or irregular hours, a week about arrangement might not be best for them.
- If there is a high degree of conflict with the other parent, week about arrangements usually will not work well.
- If the children spend equal time on the weekends and equal time in holidays with both parents, then the focus should be on what the best environment is for the children during their schooling and education, rather than the wants and needs of each parent.
In reality, there’s not a great deal of difference between five nights per fortnight and seven – it’s only two nights, just 48 hours.
Effectively, it means weekday school time, from Monday to Thursday, is shared four nights to one parent, and two nights to the other parent in that fortnight.
In other words, the parent who has five nights per fortnight has two less school nights to spend with the children each fortnight.
This will make no difference to your child’s relationship with you and no impact on how close they are to you and your family.
Coming to sensible parenting arrangements can be very difficult for some people after separation but one of the best things to do is try and view your situation objectively.
It’s always better to compromise, than spend years fighting in the family court system.
Each case is different and if you have questions about parenting arrangements, custody agreements or any other aspect of family law, please get in touch with our office today.
Call: (07) 3221 4300 or email: [email protected] to make an obligation free appointment with one of our family law specialists.
